It doesn’t take much neglect to absolutely ruin some beards. It can mean the difference between being stylish and hip, to looking like a 1930s boxcar Willie type without the excuse of being in the midst of the Great Depression. That’s “Weird Beard” and you’ve definitely seen it before. Here are 5 tips to keep your beard tamed and keep that weird beard at bay.
Know When To Grow
This is if you haven’t started growing a beard. And if you already have a beard, you can probably sympathize here. Nothing looks weirder than a beard in transition. It’s not quite full, yet it’s rough at the same time. Like it’s own beardy puberty, it still has some growing to do towards becoming a man. That’s why you should plan the beard growing phase around a vacation or otherwise care-free times when your grooming can take a backseat. We suggest doing this whilst being a successful Hollywood director, if available to you. Know that growing it out will be itchy. This will pass in about two to three weeks, depending on how quickly you grow. When you’re almost there, shape it up with a barber and discuss styling and your end goal. Check out pics online for inspiration.
Become A Clipper Master
To take complete control over your beard, and have the luxury of keeping weird beard away at time of the day, you need a decent beard trimmer. No need for professional grade, but avoid bottom rack. Select the guard level you want. There are generally set sizes (1, 2, 3, etc.) that follow a standard measurement. Once you have the right guard, run your clippers over your beard in the direction of hair growth to smooth out strays and add definition. Going against the grain will give a closer trim, but careful not to go too close. If your beard is on the longer side, a small set of barber scissors for errant strands or unwanted curls is your best friend.
Face Hair Needs Care
Beard hair is different than scalp hair. It’s thicker and coarser. Using a beard wash specially formulated with natural ingredients to clean and soften your beard will leave it so touchable, you’ll have to politely ask people to stop, or - failing that - have to write a stern letter. You want it to leave your beard clean AND moisturized. You don’t want that chemical nonsense: Hormone disrupting parabens, SLS foaming agents that give you the illusion of clean, and you definitely don’t want dyes! Grey in a beard makes a man look distinctive, confident and wise. A dyed beard is a diminished, insecure beard. Dyed beards are the weirdest of beards. Own your greys, and take care of them. Simply wet your beard with warm water, apply a small amount of your beard wash with clean hands, massage and then rinse out.
Beards Need Moisture and Shape
Your scalp creates a lot of oil, which will normally add moisture to your head hair. Beards typically don’t. And considering the thickness of the strands, it’s easy for your beard to become a wiry, dry nest without the proper maintenance. Keep your beard from becoming a dry, bristly, thistly, thirst patch by getting a proper beard balm. It will add moisture and shape and leave a pleasing masculine scent wafting in the breeze. Avoid products with silicone, which just give a sheen without actual hair nutrients. Opt for natural lipids, like shea butter, avocado oil, and cannabis sativa. Simply run the back of your thumbnail across the balm, scooping out a pea size dab. Warm the balm with your fingers and stroke through beard hair. Comb it through for beard excellence.
Beard Borders Without Disorder
While you may have a beard, that doesn’t mean you don’t have to shave. True, you’ll need to shave less, but you will need to be precise around the neck and cheekbones to give clean lines and beard definition. Use your thumb to create an anchor point above your Adam’s apple. This will be the starting point from which you’ll create a smooth, curved line along the beard toward the hinges of your jaw. Use your clippers to clear the excess brush. Then follow up by using a high quality shave soap and new razor to get a close shave that’s actually good for your skin. Similarly with your cheekbones, you’ll want to know how much you want to remove in advance. The trick is to keep it symmetrical, so err on the side of caution. You can always take away more later, but it takes a long time to grow it back.